Tuesday, 30 September 2014

Up in the Air - Introducing Exuberant Archaeologist Friend

Finally acknowledging the packed nature of our schedule, we had determined to do useful things like have a shower and maybe go to bed at some point, but fucking HELL have we got some great pictures! Sleep be damned - these pictures must be published!

We know all our regular readers will join us in a festive imaginary round of applause for our latest Counsel chum - Exuberant Archaeologist Friend! This sprightly young thing has recently returned from a trip to Rome, the Eternal City, where she went to get pissed on limoncello with her husband, and take the odd toilet photo.

Exuberant Archaeologist Friend writes in a vivacious, spirited prose, which is a joy to read. Voilà! (A translation follows below the original missive in Swedish.)

Yo, dude! 
Här kommer de första bilderna från resan. De är från Kastrups flygplats: helt nystädade toaletter ;-) De var helt ok, men tvålet var sådär, det löddrade liksom inte bra nog trots att det var sånt där skum-tvål. 

Yo, dude!
Here are the first pictures from our trip. They are from Kastrup Airport: the toilets had just been cleaned. They were totally ok, but the soap was so-so; it didn't lather enough despite being one of those foam soaps.

Copenhagen Airport - disappointing soap but almost implausibly clean!

There is a reason we have named Denmark "Everyone's Favourite Toilet Country".

Nästa är från Fiumicino i Rom. THEY FUCKING SUCKED!! Det enda som var bra med dem var krokarna inne i båsen. Toaletterna spolade automatiskt, INNAN en hann resa sig, jävla skit. Och att tvätta händerna var en plåga. Allt var automatiskt; tvål, vatten och luft, som för övrigt, (trots att den uppgick till minst orkanstyrka, INTE torkade händerna) gjorde en tillfälligt döv för att det var så jäkla högt. Och det kom alldeles för lite tvål!! Och till råga på allt så har de skyltar utanför toaletterna där de SKAMLÖST SKRYTER OM att deras toaletter är så jävla bra. NOT!!

The next pictures are from Fiumicino in Rome. THEY FUCKING SUCKED!! The only good thing about them was the coat hooks inside the stalls. The toilets flushed automatically, BEFORE one had time to get up, fucking hell. And washing one's hands was a pain. Everything was automatic; soap, water and air, which, by the way (despite reaching hurricane strength), DIDN'T dry one's hands, and made one momentarily deaf because it was so fucking loud. And there wasn't nearly enough soap! And to add insult to injury, there were signs outside the toilets SHAMELESSLY BOASTING about how fucking good their toilets are. NOT!!


Urgh - a loose seat!

At the risk of angering Exuberant Archaeologist Friend,
may we suggest that these are inoffensive flush buttons, at least?

VERY sturdy coat hooks - bravo!

More Italian bog-related clarity: aria, acqua, sapone.
 Say what you will about Italian toilets (and Exuberant Archaeologist Friend has much to say on the subject on Italian toilets - stay tuned for more!), there is one thing the Italians do well, and that is bog-related clarity. While we hate those automatic handwashing atrocities as much as the next man (or very probably more), at least the one above has charming bilingual signage.

The charming bilingual signage inspired this post's festive video:

Festive video - Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, Canzonetta sull'Aria, sung by Cecilia Bartoli and Renee Fleming (with Spanish subtitles for extra bilingual festivity).

Related Reading
More automatic handwashing atrocities:
Morrisons York - Aw, for f...
Saturday on Silver Street
Everything that needs to be said about air-dryers, ever, is said here:
More Italian bog-related clarity:

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