Sunday, 24 August 2014

A Blog Post of Astonishing Clarity

As you may suspect, the Privy Counsel picture archive is a total fucking mess. (Read all about the pheasant situation here and here.) There is stuff that's been in there so long we can no longer identify it. Like pictures from German Friend labelled "New year's email", for instance. "What email?" we ask ourselves, squinting in the light of the guttering candle. "And, crucially," we further ponder, taking a quizzical swig from our hipflask, "from what year?"
These, dear friends, are questions that will most likely never be answered. We shall of course conduct a thorough investigation, to try to identify the festive toilet pictures from German Friend, who is one of the most faithful and dedicated toilet correspondents that the world has ever seen. But we might as well warn you now, before you get your hopes up, that the outcome is uncertain.

However, let's focus on something we do know! We know that toilet proprietors the world over are batshit crazy and commit nearly constant acts of idiocy, to the delight and amusement of everyone bent on observing hygienic facilities! Here is a delicious observation from German Friend:
Set Bologna - from a historic Italian university town where people have an on switch for water, but seem to have had trouble finding it in the past. Oh, and we knew it all along, Italians have style: a bog in a bar with a full free-standing wardrobe. nice.

Italians have a fondness for bog-related clarity, it seems - certainly there is not the slightest ambiguity about what this button is for! If you find this delightful and encouraging, read more in Finally! An Italian Train!.

Where has this coat-hanger been all our life?
We're off on a bit of an adventure, during which we shall certainly take copious amounts of toilet photos, which will then languish in our archive for the foreseeable future. Maybe we should have a bit of a philosophical quote, to fortify our spiritual strength before setting off? This one comes from H. P. Lovecraft, via Medievalist (with a Side Interest in Roman Archaeology) Friend:

From even the greatest of horrors irony is seldom absent.

Oh, and also there may be developments in the "everything is totally fucking fucked up all the fucking time" situation. Victory, and sweet, sweet vengeance, have not been ruled out.

Festive video - Miranda Lambert, Only Prettier

Related Reading
All the previous, gloriously festive posts from German Friend: 
German Friend Label
Finally! An Italian Train:
Finally! An Italian Train!
Another superb Italian toilet:
On Her Majesty's Privy Service
The word "aqueduct" comes, of course, from "aqua":
Let Us Wash, for the Germanic Hordes May Appear at Any Moment

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