Saturday 12 November 2022

Spanish Missteps, Also Other Missteps

Remember when, two years ago, we ran a toilet paper origami competition, where we encouraged people to send in pictures of folded bog roll? And where the winner was supposed to receive a signed photograph of Jonny wearing a pirate costume? No, we didn't, either. No winner was ever selected, and nobody ever received a photo of Jonny, signed or otherwise. Nostra culpa! We shall do our utmost to rectify this dire mistake.

Speaking of Jonny, we occasionally get asked who Jonny is, and we never know what to answer, although we seem to remember, vaguely, possibly having made an attempt, at some point, to explain the existence of Jonny on this blog, on this blog. Usually, we resort to giving our standard definition, which is that Jonny counts as a friend for administrative reasons. There.

Other friends are neither more easily explained nor have ever featured on the Privy Counsel, which in some cases possibly counts as a loss for humanity. Luckily, in the case of a friend who we have decided to call Rampant Rat-Hunting Friend (we could tell you the story of the rats but you wouldn't want us to - trust us on this), this sad state is about to be remedied! Rampant Rat-Hunting Friend has been to Spain, and has consequently sent us a photo of below toilet, remarking:

Prison toilet. In use until 2017.

We have seen worse toilets, and we have never been to prison.
The delight does not end there. Rampant Rat-Hunting Friend continues her epistolary fireworks with this message:
Is the lid supposed to be up and the seat down when you use the toilet, or all the time?

A question for the ages. (Incidentally, this sign reminds us of German Friend's photo of admirably clear signage in Bologna.)
We ourselves have been out travelling since we last wrote - not as far as Spain, but to the fair city of Malmö, where we encountered this charming toilet, which possessed many delightful traits such as, to name but a few, coat-hooks, fragrant soap, hand sanitiser, and towels which you could fling dramatically into a basket while exclaiming, "Begone, foul fiend! I wash my hands of you!". Or words to that effect.

 
We have expressed our views on wannabe ye olden toilet flush systems before, and haven't changed our mind on this, or any other, point since.
 

Why is it trendy to put the cistern on the wall? And, more to the point, when will it stop being trendy to put the cistern on the wall?

Jonny, meanwhile, has been to Greece, from where he reported that:

There's a phone in my bathroom.

Our response, naturally, was to write back immediately, urging Jonny to pose with the toilet phone in the manner of an eighties movie villain. Reader, Jonny did not disappoint!

"Me calling reception to let them know their grilled cheese is delicious."

Since Rampant Rat-Hunting Friend absolutely will not approve of any music we might choose, ever - being, on this point, as rabid as Shewee Fiend Friend - it is utterly irrelevant which Festive Video we choose for this post.
 
Festive Video - Rocky Burnette, Tired of Toein' the Line

Also, we know for a fact that this blog is read by a total of seven people, one of whom is Our Mum, and none of whom ever watch the Festive Videos. Thus it matters not one jot whether we also link to this version of this Festive Video, and also this fantastic version.


Related Reading
That time when Lituanian Friend won a signed photo of Jonny wearing a trench coat, in a gold (well, arguably) frame: Frame of Mind 
All posts featuring German Friend
Admirably clear signage in Bologna: A Bog Post of Astonishing Clarity
Incidentally, remember that time when Australian Friend visited Beechworth Gaol
All posts featuring Jonny



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