Dunnies Down Under, or, Everything You Do Is Futile, or, Self-Medicating with Car-Sickness Tablets Is Not Hip

Being bored to the point of taking actual car sickness tablets - in the hope of being knocked out for twelve to fifteen hours - by the retrospectives and accounts of "highlights" that plague media as the calendar year approaches its end, we're not going to indulge in anything resembling either a) nostalgia or b) hand-wringing over the horrors of 2020. Instead, in a feat of if not optimism then at least a cynical refusal to engage with all the fuckery because who can be arsed any more, we're going to focus on toilet pictures from Australia.

Australian Friend, you will be pleased to know, is currently enjoying the sunshine and functioning plumbing of her homeland, and is, as regular readers are aware, an enthusiastic crapper correspondent. Here, for your enjoyment, is a selection of her recent missives!

"The delightful public toilet building in this colonial park."

 

 

 Does this delightful public toilet remind us of anything? You bet your hair shirt it does! How about the public toilets in Cubbon Park, Bangalore? (Read our balanced and objective review here.)

"I know you don't like videos but I forgot and made you a video of a toilet. It has many things I believe you may approve of. It's from a Victorian (c. 1850s) 'beauty spot' and there were peacocks." 

Indeed, there are so many things that we approve of in this video that we lose count and have to watch the video again. And again! And again! And again!

Normally, at this stage in a bog blog post, we'd be ranting about whatever snag in the fabric of the cosmos we happen to find a personal affront at the moment, frothing at the mouth and stridently yelling things like "FEMINISM NEEDS TO BE MORE MILITANT!" or "DANISH MIXER TAPS ARE NOT REAL MIXER TAPS!" into the void, halting only when the inevitable hangover causes us to focus all our energies on holding on to the toilet floor. However, today we somehow find ourselves lethargic, like an Australian at the beach, quaffing Foster's and ogling the lifeguard while idly flicking our totally rad flipflops back and forth to the soothing rhythm of the sea. (Car sickness tablets are surprisingly effective.) Maybe the sum total of things that one feels the need to rant about reached a critical mass and sucked all of the ranting into a black hole in which the infuriated expressions of pent-up peevishness will disintegrate into spaghetti-like strings of discontent? We can't prove that this didn't happen and anyway, as we apparently wrote in 2016,

Remember that ultimately, everything you do is futile. The universe is a vast and terrifying void, containing one tiny speck of dust to which we are clinging, and ultimately destroying. We are, essentially, short-sighted monkeys with computers. Now relax, and stop giving a fuck. Have a drink, maybe.

 

As regular readers are aware we are not fans of children at the Privy Counsel, and we especially abhor pictures of children. However, here is a picture a friend of ours sent us of their child, of which we approve with enthusiasm bordering on militancy. Maybe this is what we should all be doing? Having a bath, in solitude, and forgetting all the rampant fuckwittage happening outside? Happy sodding new year. Have a bath. Have a drink, maybe.

 

We would encourage everyone to adopt the message in this Festive Video as their New Year's resolution.

Festive Video: Chopper Reed, Harden the Fuck Up

Happy new year. Harden the fuck up.

Related Reading

We simply cannot recommend our friend Maureen Helen's post on so-called gender-neutral toilets enough: Does dislike of all-gender toilets make me a bigot? 

(The answer, according to legislation being rolled out in Australia very soon, is a totalitarian YES.)

All posts featuring Australian Friend

All posts featuring Australia 

All posts featuring New Year's Eve 

Our review of the public toilets in Cubbon Park, Bangalore: A Passage To India: More Indian Toilets

We are remembering with fondness, today, that time when Australian Friend assured us we could finally stop worrying about monosodium glutamate 

Athens: Vacillating with Vespasian

It's a funny thing, running an intellectual bog blog. Most people quite rightly don't give a crap and would rather chew off their own arm than read a single word of an obscure and ranty site about toilets, but every now and then one receives feedback from unlikely quarters. It turns out, for instance, that Our Mum has turned quite evangelical, and spends her time, when she isn't pissing off to Perugia on a whim to take photos of al fresco dining areas, informing people of the existence of our blog and exhorting them to read it. Consequently, we received a tip about an intriguing TV programme chronicling the history of toilets from a friend of Our Mum called Elena, which you can view below, as we have made it this post's Festive Video. We would like to extend our most gracious thanks to Elena; it was a spiffing and most invigorating video!

Since the programme in question starts off with a review of toilets in the classical world, we were reminded of some rather exciting bogs that we encountered in Greece last summer. Ergo:

Strolling around the Roman Agora in Athens with Our Mum, enjoying the unidentified pieces of marble (here is a question for everyone but especially Medievalist (With a Side Interest in Roman Archaeology) Friend: We have an app that can identify plants from just a photo. Where is the app that will identify random bits of Roman marble? How hard can it be to create a database of images of cornices, sarcophagi and columns and make it into an app so that lazy people on holiday can pronounce expert opinions on bits of marble rubble without having to learn anything or do any work?) and trying not to dwell on the sensation of sweat running down literally every crevice of our body, we stumbled across a Roman latrine! We happened to note the seat in the picture below and, eagerly scanning the horizon for an informative sign (we really do love clear signage), had our hunch confirmed! We had sauntered into the Vespasian latrines without even trying! As world-archaeology.com so eloquently puts it,

Entering from the marketplace through an antechamber, the lucky Athenians discovered elegantly raised seats over a deep channel lined with marble. Athens surely touched Vespasian in a way that cold Britain failed to, judging from this simple yet endearing monument to his largesse. 

This is an intriguing theory. Does the internationally recognised crapness of British plumbing in fact hail back to the era of Vespasian? At any rate, it seems that Vespasian was a solid dude when it comes to sanitation; regular readers will remember Exuberant Archaeologist Friend's account of Vespasian-era lead pipes in Rome.

You may imagine our happiness when suddenly clapping eyes on this toilet seat
in a far corner of the Roman Agora! On a totally unrelated note, there is a terrific restaurant just on the other side of that fence, on the corner, with very friendly waiters and excellent coffee.

A clear and informative, if somewhat dull, sign

Next up, we have pictures of the public baths by the Temple of Zeus! We spent an unreasonable amount of time, as Our Mum will verify, rambling round this area and taking toilet selfies with the ruins. What can we say? We were on holiday, and that is our idea of fun. (If you enjoy this kind of activity, do get in touch. We are finding it increasingly challenging to find people willing to go on holiday with us. We can't think why this might be.)

We are not, as a rule, excited-jumpers-up-and-down at the Privy Counsel,
considering such behaviour to be annoying to the point of being morally wrong,
but we jumped up and down with excitement when spotting these hypocausts!

A soothing circular pool

A comfortable seat for chatting to a friend?

The remains of many, many pillars

A helpful and informative sign

We went, of course, to the Acropolis, where we marvelled at the view and admired the diligent Athenian workmen restoring the ancient ruins. We also came across this random structure, near the entrance. We have no idea what it is, but took a photo on the off-chance that it is anything to do with water or sanitation (is that some kind of duct in the centre?). If any of our readers - including, but not limited to, Medieval (With a Side Interest in Roman Archaeology) Friend - has information about what this might be, don't be shy, send us an email or carrier pigeon!

An unidentified Athenian structure. THERE WAS NO SIGN!!!

No bog blogger worthy of the name would fail to take a picture of the public toilets below the Acropolis. You're welcome.

The sewage pipes in Athens are somewhat delicate,
and quite often one is requested to put toilet paper into a bin, thus.

A helpful sign instructs one not to put paper anywhere near the pipes.

Regular readers will recall our exuberant account of the toilets in the Acropolis Museum a few years ago. Readers, we went back!

As you can see, everything looks exactly the same,
which we find hugely reassuring. Also, the korai were still magnificent.

One of our favourite pastimes when in Athens, apart from staring dreamily at objects in museums, deciphering Greek signage, using the relatively-free-of-sexual-harassment public transport (we were on the tram one day, marvelling at the fact that we hadn't been sexually harassed yet, when some dude decided to harass us, showing yet again that patriarchy never sleeps), drinking Greek coffee, and buying cheap wine in the supermarket, is wandering round Syntagma Square, imbibing the atmosphere and enjoying the shade cast by the lemon trees. Imagine our delight when we discovered that this historic place boasts public toilets! They are tucked away in a corner and are very hard to find, but they are bona fide public loos, staffed by very friendly toilet attendants.

We cannot fault this door, its lock, or its coat hook.

This is not an ideal toilet, considering the fact that there is no toilet roll
and the flush mechanism has been mended using duct tape. Still. Like the Greek economy,
this toilet just about works, and the staff were super friendly.
Is this, in fact, a metaphor for the Greek economy?

 
We're never sure how interesting our readers find random pictures of hotel room toilets. To be on the safe side, here are some potentially thrilling images from the Oasis hotel in the Glyfada area of Athens. It's a very nice hotel, with very friendly staff, and we enjoyed many splendid evenings drinking the local wine on the balcony of our hotel room, but wished there had been fewer children, and also fewer Italians, in the pool. (We adore Italians at the Privy Counsel, but for some reason Italians in swimming pools are considerably less charming than Italians who are not in swimming pools. No doubt science will one day find an explanation for this phenomenon.)

No problems with the plumbing here! You can shove virtually unlimited amounts of toilet paper down the bog with no repercussions whatsoever. Also, you will notice that the toilet roll has been folded into a neat point at the end, which is the golden standard of the Olivia Joules Hotel Critera, and which is bound to give you a positive toilet experience if you give a crap about such things (we don't).

We are rather fond of this seventies symphony of pastels.

Assuming that you have even read this far, we congratulate you on your stamina and vow to let everyone rest before we post this many photos in one go again. If you have an hour to spare, please enjoy the Festive Video below! We found the toilet humour deplorable, and advise you to skip that bit, but the rest was both informative and edifying.

As you were. (If you weren't, why not?)

Festive Video: Ifor ap Glyn / Cwmni Da / Western Front Films / BBC 4, The Toilet: An Unspoken History

Related Reading:

All posts featuring Our Mum

All posts featuring Medieval (With a Side Interest in Roman Archaeology) Friend 

An intriguing post featuring Vespasian-era lead pipes:
Lead Pipe Dreams

All previous posts featuring Greece:

Beware of Greeks Bearing Gifts, But Totally Trust the Toilet Attendant 

The Ancient Agora Museum in Athens - Unbridled Stoicism

Stark Raving Nudity 

Christmas, the Acropolis Museum, and an Academic Debate (And Some Very Festive Calypso Music)

Melancholy Musings from Mykonos 

We Cheer Ourselves Up, Again, Using Pictures of Caitlin Moran and Greek Museums

All posts featuring Roman plumbing

The ominous unlockable door of Perugia:

The Ominous Unlockable Door of Perugia

Advent Musings: In Which We Rant and Ramble Aimlessly, and Don't Even Mention the Word "Toilet"

[content note: extensive vulgarity and exaggerated use of dependent clauses]

We are feeling rather smugger than usual at the moment. Today is, we have been informed by reliable sources, the first of advent, which word, as our sanest and most normal friend, the OED, informs us, means, basically, "arrival".

Here's a magnificently unhelpful and unreadable screenshot from the OED, of questionable legal status.

This has nothing in particular to do with anything, except that the Privy Counsel is rather more fragrant and attractively lit than usual, being resplendent with various lights and varieties of pine needles. Also we find ourselves marvelling at the sheer HELPFULNESS of PEOPLE, to the point where our eyes are shining with joy and appreciation in a rather sickening and repugnant manner.

Not just any people, obviously. Not the bickering couple behind us in the supermarket queue earlier today, or Australian Friend's psychotic boss, or the gobsmackingly rude people who daily congregate on Swedish trains. But for instance all the people who rallied round when we had to write an insanely boring essay on organisational theory. 

It strikes us as surreal that one can send a whingeing message to, say, Sheewee Fiend Friend, complaining about the indignity of having to write a boring essay on organisational theory, and wondering if she might know of any good books offering a feminist critique of neo-liberal politics*, and receiving, on the very same day, a whole damn reading list! We would like to extend our thanks to Shewee Fiend Friend, Shewee Fiend Friend's list-compiling friend, and all the other friends and relatives who gathered round and offered support and drinks during this difficult time.

Some attractive lighting at the Privy Counsel, representing the unholy trinity 
of intellectualism, alcoholism, and hardening the fuck up.

Apart from all the usual friendly encouragements like the sending of pictures of Elvis, the advocation of alcoholism as a way forward with academic writing, the exhortations to calm the fuck down, etc, we have had some rather marvellous news** from Australian Friend, who writes:

LOLL my cousin told me there's this expression in Australia I haven't heard before wherein if someone is whingeing you suggest that they take a 'concrete pill' - so that you can HTFU

HTFU, as all educated people know, is a delightful concept encompassing brio, zest, and chutzpah. The acronym stands for Harden The Fuck Up, and was popularised by Heath Franklin in his legendary imitation of the Australian gangster Chopper Read. Concrete pill! Hurrah!

Speaking of hardening the fuck up, we have a delightful message from Jonny. That loveable young idiot writes:

Decided to smash some gender stereotype barriers with this rather lovely bath.
Rain is pounding on the window and I have to say I'm relaxed as f*ck.
[Not pictured: massive lob-on]

Jonny being relaxed as fuck.

*The essay was supposed to be about organisational theory, but we reckoned we would end up decidedly less likely to throw ourselves out of the window in a desperate fit of depression and despair if we instead decided to engage in feminist critique of neo-liberal politics. If you can't laugh, what can you do?

**We believe we had, when setting out to write this blog post, an idea of linking this news to the concept of advent, remembering, from far-off school days, that "advent" was supposed to mean "good news" or similar. According to the OED, however, it doesn't, and we must conclude that our teachers were heartless harpies who lied to us to serve their own selfish ends.

We meant to post, for our Festive Video, The Beatles' With a Little Help from My Friends, but then we remembered that the Beatles of that phase were rather smug, repulsive people, and so we decided on this delightful Swedish Christmas song from the early '90s, that pinnacle era of culture and refinement, instead.

Festive Video - Lars Vegas Trio, Varje Dag Är Jul

Related Reading

All posts featuring Sheewee Fiend Friend
All posts featuring  Australian Friend
All posts featuring Jonny
All posts featuring the concept of HTFU
By the way, as far as we know, Jonny is still on the market

A Ray of Light From Spain

Quite possibly nobody noticed - at least we haven't received any emails from desperate, traumatised people* - but actually something weird and ominous happened recently.

We never wrote a Halloween blog post.

Regular readers will be aware that we have written a Halloween post every year since the very beginning of this blog. (If you're not quite as regular as other readers, by the way, you may have missed our recent post on the origins of the Privy Counsel - a tale of passion, violent struggle, and genital herpes!) But this year, there was no screaming bloody horror, no non-mixer taps, no weird fungal infections, no creepy dolls' eyes, no stuffed animals, no scary home-made alcohol, no blood-spattered home decorations, no meat-cleavers, no weird bits of garden hose, no electric water heaters, or any of the other traditional features of our Halloween posts.

We just thought the world was horror-filled enough as it is, and preferred to spend Halloween getting shitfaced and ranting about the patriarchy, rather than focusing on the un-dead, the un-plumbed, and the un-mixed.

To make up for our negligence, we have a special treat for you today - pictures from Audiologist Friend's trip to Spain! (Spain, by the way, as regular readers will also be aware, is on the record as being a SANE AND NORMAL COUNTRY THAT HAS ELECTRIC SOCKETS IN BATHROOMS.)

Audiologist Friend has been on a bit of a roll recently - she strolled into the Privy Counsel HQ kitchen just now looking suspiciously happy. When asked what the hell was wrong with her - sudden bursts of glee being grounds for distrust at the Privy Counsel - Audiologist Friend explained that her supervisor had tried his damnedest to find a weak spot in her work, and failed.

This is what is so great about our friends - their rampant intelligence and arse-kicking make the world a decidedly better place, despite all the horror!

We offer Audiologist Friend our sincerest contrafibularities, and hope that she will radiate smugness in the kitchen on many, many occasions.

Audiologist Friend writes:

Airb'n'b i Toledo, Spanien:
Fantastisk entré, badkar till höger som inte var något speciellt, en liten värmelampa ovanför toalettstolen - mycket uppskattat eftersom golvet var av sten och jättekallt. 

(Airb'n'b in Toledo, Spain:
Fantastic entrance, bath-tub on the right that was nothing special, a small heat lamp above the toilet - very appreciated since the floor was stone and really cold.)

We enjoy this blue shutter and the sunlight streaming in,
choosing to see it as a reminder that there are rays of light in this world.

Our eyes spy a mixer tap! And a rampantly intelligent Audiologist Friend!

We cannot, unfortunately, see the heater, but we feel better knowing that it is there.

*or indeed any emails at all, ever, from anyone. Except, obviously, spam.

After this welcome breeze of sanity from Audiologist Friend, we feel ready for a festive video. What's that? You want a rampant feminist mantra? Let's do it.

Festive video - Queen Latifah, U.N.I.T.Y.


Related Reading

All Halloween posts, ever:
Halloween

Our groundbreaking report on the toilets of the British workplace:
Oh! the horror! SCREAMING BLOODY HORROR HALLOWEEN SPECIAL: The British Workplace

The story of the origins of the Privy Counsel:
Five Fabulous (And Frightening) Years: The Story of the Privy Counsel

Our previous post on Spain, proving it to be  a SANE AND NORMAL COUNTRY THAT HAS ELECTRIC SOCKETS IN BATHROOMS

The Comfort of the Familiar - Life, Jonny, and Everything

As I dressed for dinner that night, I was conscious of an impending doom.
"Jeeves," I said, "have you ever pondered on Life?"
"From time to time, sir, in my leisure moments."
"Grim, isn't it, what?"
"Grim, sir?"
"I mean to say, the difference between things as they look and things as they are."

Nothing is certain except death and taxes.
You know that thing that happens sometimes, where you think you've hit your stride and everything is going to be alright, and then suddenly life turns up with its beefy buddies and punches you in the stomach until you throw up? It is at such times that one finds comfort in the familiar - the bottle, an intellectual toilet blog, or, in our case, pictures of Jonny's naked legs. For reasons we'd rather not go into, we've seen a lot of pictures of Jonny's legs over the years. So imagine our delight when this turned up in our inbox! 

Come hell or high water: British plumbing at its finest

Jonny says, in his truly inimitable style,

Typical English plumbing fix

Duct tape and a Tupperware lid

At least it's a mixer tub, huh?

Where did that bottle go?

Festive video: Ramblin' Jack Elliott, New Stranger Blues

Related Reading

Previous posts involving Jonny:

What Goes Around, Comes Around (warning: unappetising content)
Taking a Gander at Greatness
Jonny and a Public Toilet - A Treat for Single Ladies
Less Intellectualism, More Prurient Pictures!

Theme: "Unwanted Guests". Also, A Surprising Pin-Up!

Today's theme is, by popular request, "unwanted guests". As Obsessive Emmerdale Friend pointed out, having an unwanted visitor to one's toilet can be not just unpleasant but downright dangerous.

The first type of unwanted guest that sprang to our mind was the cockroach that we and Australian Friend shared a bathroom with in France. But perhaps we're being uncharitable. After all, what's the cockroach ever done to us? Apart from scaring the bejesus out of us in the middle of the night when we were still drunk and nearly causing us to have a collective apoplexy, the tender, softly-spoken little critter has always treated us with kindness and consideration.

Proving that Australian Friend seems to be connected in a very suspicious way to unwanted toilet beasts, the second unpleasant thing that occurred to us is the notorious toilet spider, so common in that very dangerous country, Australia. This fearsome creature will give you the heebie-jeebies at the very moment when you least want them, i.e. when you're trying to get on with your business.

Then of course there's Father Stone.





Father Ted's stony-faced heroism in the face (or arse) of an almost unbearably rough situation inspires, at least in our breast (we don't know about you), a glowing admiration bordering on hero-worship. Actually, Father Ted is rather attractive, isn't he? You're right. Let's make him a Privy Counsel Pin-Up!

Father Stone: An intrusive toilet-goer.
Father Ted: Kind of a babe!
Image from sakurakokitsa.

An eminently suitable Pin-Up: Ted knows how to charm the ladies.
Image from tedstees.com.

Related Reading
All spider- or insect-related posts:
Happy Birthday, Australian Friend!
Amie Australienne Va au Mariage, Casse Toilette (Australian Friend Goes to Wedding, Breaks Toilet)
We Receive a Postcard
A previous Father Ted-related post:
Well Done, Declan: Catholic Priests, Rabbits, and Toilets
All Previous Pin-Ups:
Gloat over the Pin-Ups Here

We Receive a Postcard

We received a postcard. The kind of postcard that reminds one that everyone has to accept the consequences of their actions. We write a blog about toilets. Ergo, we receive toilet-related postcards. Isn't that great!
This particular postcard depicts the Ireton bathroom at Packwood House, Warwickshire. Tudor Friend (for that's who the postcard was from) writes:

Greetings from the Land That Mixer-Taps Forgot! I've been out playing skulking tourist again and, for once, a place I visited had a postcard of the bathroom! It is quite a pretty bathroom; enough Delft tile to cover the Netherlands, for starters. The best part is that they'd put a disturbingly large, yet of a size to potentially be real, fake spider in the tub - I presume its purpose is to discourage marauding children from climbing in.

[...] Despite the very sort of Edwardian bathroom, the house is actually more Tudor - the sort where its core is authentic, and much of its furnishing is of the period but scrounged from other properties being demolished in the '30s and '40s (ed's note: heinous, heinous crimes!). Funny how no-one ever feels the need to harmonize the loo by recycling an old Tudor bog... (At the other house I saw today, they'd converted the medieval toilet and shit-chute into a priest's hole for hiding during the messy days of Reformation. They were not 100 % sure it had actually ceased to be used as a loo at the time, but I sincerely hope, for the guys who were down there, that it had!)

The Ireton bathroom, Packwood House.
Apparently Cromwell's general Henry Ireton spent the night at Packwood House
before the Battle of Edgehill in 1642. We trust he had a pleasant stay.

We are simultaneously delighted and bemused by this spout.
Is it a lion-shaped mixer-tap?
Image from katyboo1.

Close-up of the pretty Delft tiles.
Image from flickr.

Does this bathroom remind us of anything? Of course it does! It reminds us of Christian IV's bathroom at Rosenborg Castle in Copenhagen!

In other news, Tudor Friend has been busy making plans for World Toilet Day. This auspicious day, in case you didn't know, has been made official by the UN. If ever there was a cause to rejoice, this is it! World Toilet Day was created to highlight the fact that millions of people worldwide suffer from diseases that are easily preventable by simple hygiene measures, like access to clean water and safe toilets. Tudor Friend suggests making "Toilet Day greeting cards to send to friends, and cake toppers for our celebratory cupcakes". A smashing good idea, as far as we're concerned! To see suggestions for Toilet Day card designs, check out our Facebook or Twitter page.

Related Reading

World Toilet Day-Related
The Gates Foundation (funds projects for better water, sanitation and hygiene)
Toilet Twinning
WaterAid
Oxfam Unwrapped: Safe Water for Ten People (a hot Christmas gift tip!)
Related Privy Counsel Posts
Blogging Something Rotten
The Historic Toilet Tour of York

Det lille Apotek: Big Beers and Small Toilets in Everyone's Favourite Toilet Country
On the Tiles

A Lovely Cavalcade of Photos

Ho-hum. Here we were, trying primarily to a) relax and CTFD, but getting increasingly anxious and resorting to b) getting some sodding work done, when we were, predictably, side-tracked by people sending us lovely photos. (We're not complaining!)
So, since it is, after all, Saturday night, let's get a little bit festive! Behold, a lovely cavalcade of photos!

German Friend offered this glimpse of things to come:
"A little preamble to the still missing existentialist toilet...
That theme seems to be all the rage in Deutschland!"
We caper with joy at the thought of the forthcoming existentialist toilet,
and are simultaneously reminded of the large amount of
Uzbek material still lurking in the Privy Counsel archives!
Readers are advised to hold on to their hats, as there
is severe fabulousness coming!
(For a similar amusing image, see A Festive Update.)
Image from StreetArtGermany.

This lovely bamboo bath comes from Tudor Friend, and rather reminds
us of another spiffing tub that came our way once!
Image from Guadua Bamboo.

This beaut was sent to us by Czech Mate, and introduced to us with the words,
"Behold, the from-within-illuminated wash basin from a Leeds buffet place"!
Are you feeling the warm and friendly karma emanating
from  the motion-sensor mixer tap? We are! Woof!

Finally, lest we get above ourselves: a simple but functional
bog from the Guild 45 Cinema in Seattle.
Loving the rough cement floor  and Tork bog-roll holder!
Image by Bogsley Hansson Friend.

Having enjoyed the crap out of this festive cavalcade, it is now time to sigh wistfully and get on with some rather high-falutin' and morally rigid Anglo-Saxon poetry. Wæs hæl!

Related Reading:
A Festive Update
Rock'n'Roll

Privy Counsel Pin-Up: Ablutions with Toby

Don't ask us why, but it's time for another Privy Counsel Pin-Up. Likewise don't ask us why, but we were lucky enough to come across a picture of Toby Stephens in the bath! Most people know this actor from Jane Eyre, but it turns out he's done lots of other stuff as well. Stephens has, it appears, strong cleanliness credentials; check out this video of him tending to his hygiene!

A reviewer on Amazon has this to say about Toby Stephens' audio books:

"Let Toby's velvet voice wash over you like melted chocolate as he breathes life into Tales from the Arabian Nights: Aladdin, Ali Baba and Sinbad, as only Toby can." 

Oooh, yes please. (It's quite hard to find quotes relating to Toby Stephens and hygiene on the internet. This one's got the word "wash" in it - that's as good as it gets.)

Hurrah! Another instance of Toby Stephens bathing; this time in The Camomile Lawn!
Image from digplanet

Related Reading
Jane Eyre - Plunging into Passion
Privy Counsel Pin-Up - Colin Firth 
Privy Counsel Pin-Up - James Purefoy
Anthony Hopkins Uses Hand Sanitizer, Avoids Winter Vomiting Disease

Well Done, Declan: Catholic Priests, Rabbits, and Toilets

We find ourselves so exhausted by recent academic, and other, exploits, that we are utterly unable to do anything more taxing than vegetating on the sofa, watching Father Ted.

In order to produce a blog update and feel at least marginally productive, here's a vaguely toilet-related clip from one of our favourite tv shows!

http://www.channel4.com/programmes/father-ted/video/series-2/episode-6/toilet-training

You know it makes sense.

Natural Born Bather

Here at the Privy Counsel, we're in favour of all things bath-related and ecological. Modern bathrooms, though usually comfortable (unless the plumbing and the taps are all messed up) and hygienic (unless they're crappily built and mouldy), place high demands on Mother Nature in terms of energy and chemicals.
Fictional Friend sent us a picture of this lovely bath, from Natural Homes. It was apparently built by a handy chap called Dan Phillips.

Soaking up good vibes - a lovely bath!

We think it looks extremely comfortable and conducive to good posture!

Privy Counsel Pin-Up - Colin Firth

  Our recent dry, scholarly raid into monastic plumbing has given us an itch to contemplate something slightly more frivolous. Luckily, we had the happy notion of posting a Privy Counsel Pin-Up!

  A vicious and annoying cold has occasioned us to spend a disproportionately large amount of time on the Privy Counsel sofa, enjoying Pride and Prejudice. Mr Darcy, played by Colin Firth, displays an energetic passion for hygiene. The wet shirt scene is, of course, famous, but we happen to also quite enjoy the scene where Mr Darcy has a bath!

Mr Darcy is, it would seem, laudably hygienic. (Image from Austenprose.)

  From what we can conclude from a brief Google trawl, there is a lot to be said on the subject of Georgian hygiene. One woman, foraying into the world of Regency reality dating shows, "washes her hair with a sticky concoction of rum, eggs, and rose water. She brushes her teeth with an ineffective paste that tastes like chalk dust. She unsuccessfully fights body odor with lemon juice. And when it’s time to take a bath, everyone subservient to the highest ranking person in the house has to use cold, dirty bathwater".

  We gather some more information from the Cookit blog:

The Georgians did not have very good personal hygiene.
People started to wash more often by the Regency period. By this time cotton had also become a popular fabric, as it washed more easily than others. However, for most of the period, both rich and poor were much smellier than today, many had rotting teeth and unsanitary habits.

  There were few flushable indoor toilets. After a long dinner, at the point where the ladies withdrew, both sexes would make use of chamber pots, the gentlemen behind a screen in the dining room itself and the ladies behind a screen in the drawing room.  Hygiene was not a great priority for any of the social classes and ladies’ fans were not only to keep them cool. They were also to disperse the odours of their less than fragrant menfolk. George III introduced sea bathing to the gentry as a healthy and pleasurable diversion, but only for the men; it was not deemed suitable for women. Some men took to having a daily dip in a cold plunge pool. This was thought a healthy, rather than hygienic, activity.

  Mrs Bennet, it must be said, attempts to persuade her husband to take the family to Brighton, so that she can go sea-bathing - a most admirable notion. "A little sea-bathing," she tells Mr Bennet, "would set me up forever". He, however, proves unimpressed with the idea, retorting, "And yet, I am unmoved". We believe we can safely say, without giving away the plot, that they don't go to Brighton, and that nobody goes sea-bathing.

Related Reading
Lucy Worsley and Jane Austen: Historical  Toilet Etiquette 
Pride and Prejudice and Plumbing
Privy Counsel Pin-Up: Ablutions with Toby
It Is Tolerable, We Suppose: A Privy Counsel Pick-Me-Up