Thursday, 15 March 2012

HTFU: A Journey through an Australian Dunny

 Australian Friend went to a wedding recently. We've seen the pictures from the wedding itself, and they were awesome, as the Aussies say. However, the best photos of all are these ones, from the toilets at the Pirate's Tavern in Melbourne!
Arrrr, me old seadogs, behold - a photographic journey through an Australian dunny!

Australian Friend: "Note the charming
syntactical inconsistency: ‘men’s’ and ‘ladies’.
The Olde Worlde font refers
to the Olde Worlde bar that belongs
to these toilets, The Pirate's Tavern.
Which was actually amazing."

"One wonders why the surface may be slippery..."

"Upon entry we are greeted by a traffic cone, in keeping with the great
Australian tradition of using things for purposes other than the intended."

"The main bathroom area: very old school. This was exactly the kind of bathroon we had in school...
Probably made from fibro cement, with a corrugated iron roof and a cement floor."

"And the throne itself, or as it is known down under, the ‘dunny can’. Note the old-school toilet seat
(Australian toilet seats never come unhinged like English ones do)."

"Typical Australian decor is essentially minimalist."

"Contrary to popular belief, toilet water flushes the same way in Oz as it does in England... Only better.
The Privy Counsel will note with concern the lack of a lid."
(Yes! And the toilet rolls on the floor! Hygeia had to suck down a stiff brandy
and breathe deeply for several minutes before recovering her equilibrium).

"I was pleased to find the considerate inclusion of a coat hook (so frequently lacking)
and heavy duty bolt lock. Toilet-roll holder sadly broken."

"On closer inspection of trough, note admirable design choice of function over style."
(We note with joy that there is plenty of back-up bog roll).

"Who needs a mixer tap when the only water is cold?
Who needs a soap dispenser when the soap is not in liquid form?"
(Well, quite).

"Despite the minimalism, tea light candles in jam jars and native wildflowers
make you feel loved, as you wash your hands."

 Well, wasn't that lovely! Actually these toilets only get three points according to the Privy Counsel's stringent standards, but to be perfectly honest, this was definitely the kind of party where everyone was too busy having fun to worry about the toilets! Our best wishes to the bride and groom, who looked smashing in the photos!

The Pirate's Tavern
Williamstown Maritime Association
PO Box 61
Williamstown, VIC 3016

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